Quotes for
the Journey:

Self



We either make ourselves miserable,
or we make ourselves strong.
The amount of work is the same.

Carlos Castaneda

   

People grind and grind in the mill of a truism, and nothing comes out but what was put in.  But the moment they desert the tradition for a spontaneous thought, then poetry, wit, hope, virtue, learning, anecdote, all flock to their aid.       - Ralph Waldo Emerson

   

Remember always that you have not only the right to be an individual; you have an obligation to be one.  You cannot make any useful contribution in life unless you do this.       -Eleanor Roosevelt

   
Resolve to be thyself; and know that those Who find themselves, lose their misery.      - Matthew Arnold
   

When you can, always advise people to do what you see they really want to do, so long as what they want to do isn't dangerously unlawful, stupidly unsocial, or obviously impossible.  Doing what they want to do, they may succeed; doing what they don't want to do, they won't.        -James Gould Cozzens

   
You and I can profit by asking ourselves:  What do I see when I look through the lens of my attitude toward myself?  Am I more a critic than a friend?  Do I look beyond the surface blemishes to find the truly beautiful and unique person that I am?  Or do I play the destructive "comparison game"?  What verdict does the juror of my mind pass on me:  "good at heart" or "guilty on all counts"?        -John Powell, S.J.
    
Endeavor to be patient in bearing the defects and infirmities of others, of what sort soever they be; for thou thyself also hast many failings which must be borne with by others.        -Thomas a Kempis

What another would have done as well as you, do not do it.  What another would have said as well as you, do not say it; written as well, do not write it.  Be faithful to that which exists nowhere but in yourself--and there make yourself indispensable.        -Andre Gide
    
All of us have to seek in our own way to make our own selves more noble and to realize our own true worth.       - Albert Schweitzer
    
It is healthy to accept myself as I am, to like myself, and to love myself.  It is okay for me to accept a compliment or praise. Because I am just as deserving and worthy as anyone else, I may treat myself as well as I treat others, live my own life, and enjoy my life.  There is a difference between being unselfish and being a martyr or a victim.  There is a time for putting myself first so that I may take care of myself and my needs.        -Jill Wolf
   
Happiness belongs to those who are sufficient unto themselves.  For all external sources of happiness and pleasure are, by their very nature, highly uncertain, precarious, ephemeral, and subject to chance.        - Arthur Schopenhauer
   
Being bored is an insult to oneself.       - Jules Renard
   
Be yourself and think for yourself; and while your conclusions may not be infallible, they will be nearer right than the conclusions forced upon you.       - Elbert Hubbard
    
The person who makes everything that leads to happiness depend upon him or herself, and not upon other people, has adopted the very best plan for living happily.       -Plato
   

   
The older I get, the more I realize the importance of exercising the various dimensions of my body, soul, mind, and heart.  Taken together, these aspects give me a sense of wholeness.  I want to be a whole human being rather than one who limps on one leg because I don't know how to use all of my parts.  Intellectual, emotional, and physical activity are not separate entities.  Rather, they are dimensions of the same human being.        -Robert Fulghum
    
You have to be true to yourself, but you have to be true to your best self, not to the self that secretly thinks you are better than other people.       -Stephen Gaskin
    
You've got to believe deep inside yourself that you're destined to do great things.       -Joe Paterno
   
There's only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving,  and that's your own self.        - Aldous Huxley
   
Compassion for others begins with kindness to ourselves.      -Pema Chödrön
   
The Hasidic rabbi, Zuscha, was asked on his deathbed what he thought the kingdom of God would be like.  He replied, "I don't know.  But one thing I do know.  When I get there I am not going to be asked, 'Why weren't you Moses?  Why weren't you David?'  I am only going to be asked, 'Why weren't you Zuscha?  Why weren't you fully you?'"       -Alan Loy McGinnis

     

   
Each heart is a world.-- You find all within yourself that you find without.-- To know yourself you have only to set down a true statement of these that ever loved or hated you.       - Johann Kasper Lavater
   
What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think.  This rule, equally arduous in actual and intellectual life, may serve for the whole distinction between greatness and meanness.  It is the harder, because you will always find those who think they know what is your duty better than you know it.  It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great person is one who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.       -Ralph Waldo Emerson
   
When you reread a classic you do not see more in the book than you did before; you see more in you than there was before.        -Clifton Fadiman
    
I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence, but it comes from within.  It is there all the time.       -Anna Freud
   
We all have choices to make about the quality of our presence and how we will affect those around us.  The quality of our presence is dependent not on what we can or cannot “do” but on the essence of who we are and how we relate to others.  Becoming the presence we would like to be is an intentional work.  It grows while we make peace with ourselves and with life.       - Sallirae Henderson
    
The holiest of holidays are those
Kept by ourselves in silence and apart;
The secret anniversaries of the heart.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
   
Don't compromise yourself.  You are all you've got.       -Janis Joplin
    
In solitude all great things are born.       -Moses Harvey
   
The path of awakening is not about becoming who you are.  Rather it is about unbecoming who you are not.       -Leonard Jacobson
   
You are a child of the universe, “fearfully and wonderfully made.” In the history of creation, there has never been anyone like you.  Accept this reality about yourself— that you are a special, unique human being who has a place on this earth that no one else can fill.  Acknowledge yourself as a glorious expression of your loving Creator.  This healthy self-love will form the foundation of a joyful and satisfying life.  Then, as you love and accept yourself, your inner light will shine outward to bless and heal your fellow human beings.       - Douglas Bloch
   
I shall try to remember all this day that I am a divine creation with infinite possibilities.       - Benjamin Eitelgeorge
   

   
To set us on a clear path, it is important to communicate well, at least with ourselves.  To know what we want, to know what we mean, and to learn to express ourselves clearly, with as little confusion as possible.  If you are confused about yourself, you can expect to be misunderstood by those around you.  You have to set your mind straight, and that is a task that no one else can undertake for you.       -Rosemary Altea
   
Coming to appreciate your worth can, in some cases, dramatically improve your circumstances by changing the choices you make and the actions you take.  And as you begin to treat yourself with more respect, other people begin to do the same, since we subconsciously "train" others how to treat us through messages we send through body language, tone of voice, and other subtle cues and behaviors.  Discovering your innate worth and living from that place allows you to make more constructive choices--to choose the higher roads of life.       -Dan Millman
   
Treating ourselves as a best friend is an important factor in the quality of our current living and will be crucial in our last years.  It’s the only way we can gain an intimate knowledge of who we are and what we need.  Being familiar with – and able to articulate – our wants and needs gives us some control of our lives, and is absolutely essential when we are old and may have to rely on others to do what we can no longer do for ourselves.       -Sallirae Henderson
  
You cannot fail at being yourself.  A cat doesn't try to be a tiger, and you shouldn't try to be something you aren't.  You are a process, not a product.  Your job is to discover what you are and to create that creature.  You still won't be perfect, but success isn't about perfection-- it is about authenticity.  You are a success if you are being your real, authentic self.       - Bernie Siegel
   
Contentment. . . comes as the infallible result of great acceptances, great humilities—of not trying to make ourselves this or that (to conform to some dramatized version of ourselves), but of surrendering ourselves to the fullness of life—of letting life flow through us.       -David Grayson
  
If I can think of myself as loved, I can love and accept others.  If I see myself as forgiven, I can be gracious toward others.  If I see myself as powerful, I can do what I know is right.  If I see myself as full, I can give myself freely to others.       -Kathy Peel
   
We all want recognition for our “specialness.”  But we should never take our self-worth from our society, feedback from others, or our own comparisons to others.  Our self-esteem should be based in the fact that God created us with the utmost care and has called His creation good.  In His foresight we are all made of “the right stuff.”  Our self-worth then comes from how we use it, in service to our families and communities, exercising our creative gifts, and becoming one with God.       -unattributed
   
You may study with the highest teachers, but you will find no one but yourself teaching you.  You may travel the world over, yet find nothing but yourself, reflected the world over.  So if you now find yourself in a cell, take heart that of all the teachers in the world, out of all the places in the world, you still have with you the only ultimate ingredient of your journey:  yourself.        - Bo Lozoff
   

   
Thinking like a winner means not always having to defeat someone else.  It means being able to grow from a situation in which you fail to reach your goal.  It involves not demanding perfection from yourself in every single thing you do, but, instead, thinking of yourself as perfect and thus capable of growing.  It means reminding yourself that perfection doesn’t mean staying the same; it means being able to allow yourself to grow.  Thinking as a winner means not coming down on yourself; it means refusing to allow self-repudiating thoughts into your head.  It involves pushing out the inclination to evaluate yourself in comparison with others, and giving yourself permission to be the unique person you are.       - Wayne Dyer
   
In a world in which we are exposed to more information, more options, more philosophies, more perspectives than ever before, in which we must choose the values by which we will live (rather than unquestioningly follow some tradition for no better reason than that our own parents did), we need to be willing to stand on our own judgment and trust our own intelligence—to look at the world through our own eyes—to chart our course and think through how to achieve the future we want, to commit ourselves to continuous questioning and learning—to be, in a word, self-responsible.       - Nathaniel Branden
   
“The things we see,” Pistorius said softly, “are the same things that are within us.  That is why so many people live such unreal lives.  They take the images outside them for reality and never allow the world within to assert itself.”       -Herman Hesse (in Demian)
   

  
This morning take a few minutes to reflect on how you give of yourself to the world.  Often we get caught up in the frenzy of buying and giving things.  Look at the ways you give appreciation, friendship, energy, time, love, and affection, and give of your own special talents and abilities throughout the year.  Acknowledge yourself for having enriched the lives of others.  Spend some time loving yourself for the giving light that you are.       - Shakti Gawain
   
There is no such thing as can’t, only won’t.  If you’re qualified, all it takes is a burning desire to accomplish, to make a change.  Go forward, go backward.  Whatever it takes!  But you can’t blame other people or society in general.  It all comes from your mind.  When we do the impossible we realize that we are special people.       - Jan Ashford
    
It is never too late to be what you might have been.       - George Eliot
   
Try not to become a person of success but rather try to become a person of value.       - Albert Einstein
    
I do not know when I have had happier times in my soul, than when I have been sitting at work, with nothing before me but a candle and a white cloth, and hearing no sound but that of my own breath, with God in my soul and heaven in my eye . . . . I rejoice in being exactly what I am,--a creature capable of loving God, and who, as long as God lives, must be happy.  I get up and look for a while out the window, and gaze at the moon and stars, the work of an Almighty hand.  I think of the grandeur of the universe, and then sit down, and think myself one of the happiest beings in it.       -attributed to a poor 18th-century Methodist woman
   
Up to a point people’s lives are shaped by environment, heredity, and movements and changes in the world about them; then there comes a time when it lies within their grasp to shape the clay of their lives into the sort of thing they wish to be. . . . Everyone has it within their power to say, this I am today, that I shall be tomorrow.       - Louis L’Amour
  
As children of the Most High God we are to accept ourselves as the natural creation does—which simply is in great beauty, without self-condemnation.  Yet those people who truly love and accept themselves are rare.  Why do we seek self-worth through social recognition and acquisition, as though those were needed?  We are special children of God, the Creator of worlds without measure.  As such each one of us is intrinsically very, very worthy.       - Bruce Gilbert
   
The more you surrender to the fear of someone’s disapproval, the more you lose face in your own eyes, and the more desperate you become for someone’s approval.  Within you is a void that should have been filled by self-esteem.  When you attempt to fill it with the approval of others instead, the void grows deeper and the hunger for acceptance and approval grows stronger.  The only solution is to summon the courage to honor your own judgment, frightening though that may be in the beginning.       -Nathaniel Branden
   
To the extent that we honor all aspects of ourselves, we remove revulsion, self-hate, horror, and terror from our lives.  As whole human beings we are the creatures of the greatest complexity on this planet.  Respect for this complexity includes our insisting on acceptance of the inconsistent and incongruous.       - Theodore Rubin
  
Just trust yourself, then you will know how to live.       -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
   
A spiritual kingdom lies all about us, enclosing us, embracing us, altogether within reach of our inner selves, waiting for us to recognize it.  God Himself is here awaiting our response to His presence.  This eternal world will come alive to us the moment we begin to reckon upon its reality.       -A.W. Tozer
   
How I feel about and behave toward myself is the basic determinant of most of my behavior.  If I improve my self-regard, I will find that dozens of behaviors change automatically.  If, for example, I increase my feelings of self-competence, I will probably be less defensive, less angered by criticism, less devastated if I do not get a raise, less anxious when I come to work, better able to make decisions, and more able to appreciate and praise other people.       - Will Schultz
   
There is an Indian proverb or axiom that says that everyone is a house with four rooms--a physical, a mental, an emotional, and a spiritual.  Most of us tend to live in one room most of the time, but unless we go into every room every day, even if only to keep it aired, we are not a complete person.       -Rumer Godden
   
We must not allow other people’s limited perceptions to define us.       - Virginia Satir
   
Something we were withholding made us weak 
Until we found it was ourselves.        - Robert Frost
   
A little criticism makes me angry, and a little rejection makes me depressed.  A little praise raises my spirits, and a little success excites me.  It takes very little to raise me up or thrust me down.  Often I am like a small boat on the ocean, completely at the mercy of its waves.  All the time and energy I spend in keeping some kind of balance and preventing myself from being tipped over and drowning shows my life is mostly a struggle for survival:  not a holy struggle, but an anxious struggle resulting from the mistaken idea that it is the world that defines me.       -Henri J.M. Nouwen
   
Accepting the labels other people try to tag us with is one of the most destructive things we can do to ourselves.  Because once we accept those labels, we allow them to define us--what we can do, what we should want, what we can and can't have.  We start considering what others think is right for us instead of using our own instincts and self-knowledge to make our own best choices.  Over the years I have learned that we can't live genuinely until we learn to disregard the labels and judgments of others.  As some wise person once said, "You aren't what people call you, you are what you answer to."  The better we become at ignoring whatever people call us, the closer we get to fulfilling our dreams, the easier it becomes to create the life we really want, not the life someone else thinks we should have.       -Patti LaBelle
   

   

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